So…my dear bloggers. I am late. Of course you knew that because you’ve periodically checked to see if I had kept my word of posting a blog every day for a month. Ahh…see I know the mind of the individuals…Feel my power…muwaha-never mind. Sorry if I seem a bit out of sorts tonight. I feel as if my world has just turned upside down and I had a conniption fit. I feel like Alice. Except I didn’t get the choice to follow the white rabbit. (Why the heck did she follow the white rabbit? I mean…who follows a white rabbit with a clock right? Crazy.)
But alas, I digress. Today has been one of the most insane days of my life. I feel as if my emotions once again have ridden that terror of a roller coaster, but instead of the same ride, it’s been 20 times higher than before and a billion times faster. But…I shall leave that for the present section. (Yes I know, you’re disappointed, I’m sure.) This blog is going to be a bit shoter…considering it’s going to be posted late. But hey! I started writing it when it was the day…so that counts, right? Right. I knew you’d agree with me.
The Past:
Okay…so where were we? (Has anyone else noticed that when we say that, there’s far to many words with w’s in them? Ugh. Just did it again.) Right. I was born… Now I had three older half brothers. Very much older than I, actually. The youngest was ten years older. Things seemed peachy for a while. Of course I was a babe and don’t remember but a few snippets here and there of my childhood. But people tell me it was great. But then. Tragedy struck and my mother passed away from cancer just a month after I turned 4 years old. A flurry of things happened after that. But I will keep it short as to not bore you to sleeping and waking up later with the imprint of a keyboard upon your face. (See how kind and considerate I am?) But pretty much what occurred is that my dad couldn’t take care of the four of us. So my two oldest brothers moved out and my youngest-oldest brother was placed with other family. I, therefore was left with my father. Taking care of him as best a 4 year old could, with the tv as my only form of comfort and entertainment. (Aside from my dad and I’s frequent trips to McDonalds for ice cream cones.) I gradually became a spoiled brat, in every sense of the word. People felt sorry for me for losing my mother, and therefore, gave me whatever I wanted. (Not the best idea to a child, but it wasn’t exactly my choice.) But here I shall stop, because the next section of the past is tragic and I’d rather get on with the present!
The Present:
Wow, where to begin. I don’t know. But I suppose I should start from the beginning of the day. I slept in this morning. Why, you may ask? Well it’s because I was too stressed out about the college thing to sleep. So it was about 12 before I was awake and ready to face the world. Face the world as much as I could anyway. I was severely depressed. Now hold on, I’m not going to cry about my troubles to you and make you hit that magic back button, so just hear me out, okay? It had been a long time since I had actually gotten to really talk to my boyfriend. Sure we shared the occational text during the day, but it wasn’t nearly enough. Within that hour, I had found out my boyfriend had the same depressing mood. This brought us to depressing talk. We’re long distance, so it’s even harder on us. He felt worthless and said I deserved better. I know what you’re thinking. “I thought you said this wasn’t going to be a teenage soap opera! You LIED!” Yeah yeah…perhaps I did. But can you allow me a BIT of the dramatics? Please? Sheesh. You’re so demanding. Hehe.
Anyway…We talked for about two hours. And then. Out of the blue. He decides he’s coming out to California. He’s running away from home to come live with me until we can settle things with his parents. (They do not approve of us.) Yes…I know. It was drastic. Probably stupid. But it was impulsive. And I can’t help but be torn between multiple feelings. I’m scared for him. I’m so horribly sad that his family is going through this. I hurt for him and all he’s going through, but I can’t help but be really excited that he’s coming out here to see me…
So Yes. He will be here tomorrow. And will probably be watching me write my next blog. Exciting for you? No. Exciting for me? HECK YES!
The Future:
Well this section changed A LOT from the last blog. What is the future going to hold? I have no clue. I do know that I want to finish my education, and so does my boyfriend. So we’ll just take things one step at a time. But things got a whole lot less complicated by him coming out here, I think. Now I don’t have to feel bad about going to a school out here in Cali. He’ll be with me! (Yeah yeah, I know. Moosh. Deal with it.) Love you ya little stalkers. Until tomorrow. Er. Today by 19 min.
~Nicole
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